Thursday, April 1, 2010

on wetting oneself

i'm weird, its true. ask the sisters. so it only seems reasonable that strange and ridiculous things would follow my being. and i don't know if its just me that these things happen to, or if i get such a kick out of them that i make it into something hilarious.

went to the greenbelt for the first time yesterday. fun was had by all. but, it being march and all, the water is still a tad chilly for my taste. so i keep to the bank and have a grand old time soaking up the sun and drinking some lone star, making fun of passers-by. when the time comes to pee, i opt to crawl into the woods that is the greenbelt and find a nice tree to relieve myself, instead of sitting in the freezing cold waters. duh. and me, being a well-raised pottsvillian, knows how to do this properly. i had some issues with it at first (age 5, approximately) but these things have ironed themselves out over the course of many backroading adventures and trips to the leon. somehow, though, i manage to soak my bathing suit with my own urine, and then transfer said substance onto my shorts. super cool move, right. i make the best of the situation by shrugging this little incident off and hiking back up the hill to where car is parked. things are going well up until someone (someone, who despite my efforts to deter vision of my wet bottom, has spotted the discrepancy) asks casually, "is that pee?" keep in mind no one has been in the water past their knees, so there is no pawning this off on the river. so, my driver insisted i sit on a towel on the way back into town. i would have been embarrassed, except for some reason; peeing on myself in the wilderness does not seem nearly as bad as anywhere else.

more stories to follow, i am certain because hilarious and unfortunate things are usually happening to me.

1 comment:

  1. I don't know how this blogpost went uncommented! 1. Good to see you label yourself a "pottsvillian" 2. I would have "accidently" poured something on myself HOWEVER 3. I don't think I could pull off peeing myself like you JUST did! You made it almost seem cool enough that I thought about peeing my pants, cause it's the thing to do ;)

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